Law Office

The Legal Process

The legal process will go as quickly or as slowly as the slowest one of the two people in the process. Most people make the mistake of rushing and will prematurely file for divorce. This starts a long (Up to 18 months) and expensive process that has an unpredictable path. Too often people start the legal action without thinking through the real response of their partner. Frequently, the mere act of filing for divorce sets in motion a time and money whirlwind that spirals out of control and takes financial resources from the family that could be better served if retained by the family…like in a college account or a vacation. Careful consideration to the timeline, the desired result and the real ability of a courthouse to deliver the best solution must be made. Failure to do so means extra dollars spent yielding significant long-term financial and emotional detriment to the entire family, often most significantly to the children.

Very few people feel that they were served well or even adequately by the court system. Taking control of your legal case increases the likelihood of dollars saved, relationships preserved and satisfaction realized. It means better results and less chance of having to go back to court in the future.

Working with a Lawyer

Choosing a lawyer is difficult.  If you are lucky, you will never have to pick one. But for anyone considering a family law matter or going through a divorce or a separation, consulting with an attorney is a must. Family, friends and therapists will often have a suggestion of a good lawyer. Those suggestions or referrals are just that: suggestions. Take the time and make the relatively inexpensive investment of interviewing a few lawyers before you make your final selection. This is a very personal and usually a long-term relationship.

Your expectations and the lawyer’s ability to deliver the result you hope to achieve must match. If not, you are guaranteed to experience disappointment with the process, the timeline, the cost and/or the result and the potential need to select a second attorney during the process. Assess your communication and work style and that of the prospective attorney during your consultation. Discuss with the lawyer how you expect the lawyer to work with you. Be sure you are comfortable. Hiring a lawyer is just like hiring any other professional. Trust your gut. This is an expensive, long-term relationship….you don’t want to have to find a new lawyer or change your legal strategy part way through.

Preserving Your Estate, Keeping Your Assets

Most people spend too much money on a divorce. We believe the family is always better served if the marital estate remains with one or both of the parties, ultimately the children, rather than paid out as legal fees. Separation and divorce are expensive. The family budget, at a time when it is already strained, takes on the added lawyers of costs of legal fees, court costs, attorneys, Guardian Ad Llitem, second households and therapy.  It may also require mediation fees and parenting evaluation costs. Taking actions to carefully plan the added layers of cost will preserve the estate. Though not an easy task and contrary to most people’s instinct, being candid about divorce, having those difficult, critical conversations, not keeping things secret and/or hiding assets, help to control the time and cost of a divorce.

Using conflict resolution techniques such as mediation or collaborative law will redefine relationships to preserve them for the future and may reduce the cost of the process. Learn what process will work best for your style and that of your spouse and family. Make sure your legal team and your legal strategy meet your objectives. Trust and use your lawyer. Well-intended friends and family members may give you advice, usually based upon someone’s horror story. While they may be trying to protect you, often friends’ and family’s advice is base on situations which are completely different from your unique fact pattern and may back fire if used in your situation.